OH MAD COW

Oh mad cow, let me lick your rump,
Let me toil in endless worship.
Oh mad cow, fill me with disease,
Make my eyes bulge out in ecstasy.

Your revenge is so absurdly sweet,
Served up in McDonald's a billion times a day.
Let me suck your udder like a chicken wing, honey 
Barbecue sauce is your perfume.

Sacrifice a pigeon in the name of Joan Rivers,
Stab me with a corkscrew and open my livers.
Aryan aggression stymied by reruns of Hogan's Heroes,
Richard Dawson never looked so alluring.

Porkers' hips droop down like wax,
Fetal residue on train tracks,
Bunsen burners light in orgy,
Burn your back hair, purge your licentious phlegm,
And lock yourself alone in a closet and mount a Bundt cake.

Fascinating nipples found in your bag,
Dilapidated rocket launched into an enormous sponge,
Soaking in the incessant taxation and ignorance of the New Millennium,
Two parties of enormous dildos filling your head with Schlockguage.

Back up into your garage and hide your diaper fetish,
Huggies licked in anticipation of your aged return to urinal freedom.
Mirror your deformities with the drill I bring you,
And smash the picture frame upon divorce.

Oh, Octopus, eight arms to hold me,
But insecurity comes vomiting out my ears,
And turns into a big fucking compromise,
Bigger than the foundation of your entire relationship...
Oh wait a second, nah, I take that back.

{POETRY}