AND SOME DAYS YOU DON'T
Never dilapidated by your turpentine shine,
Rebel on a mission for tuition to Pepperdine.
Malibu fortress, wipe it out in an earthquake,
Californians minds all mushy like cheese cake.
Abandon your perspective on marriage and take a butter bath,
Lather it up and shine like a cellophane monkey.
Steroids Junkie, explosions in your brain,
Burping up curry in the whoring rain,
Your chest looks like Buzz Buzzard right before Woody pooped on it.
Sex appeal, traditional Schpiel,
I potato peeled your eyebrows and made you kneel and bow down,
To the Yoohoo Guru, the master plotting Seers,
Meditate on a crate full of Eisenhower queers.
Never in a million years did shocking pink become you,
Sit and spin on a Tarot card you pantomimed Jew.
Race a cosmic yuppie to the 401K finish line,
You sound like Ethyl Merman "on" a helium balloon.
She mounted her husband like a butterfly,
And wiped her tushi with a Dragon Fly,
Then she worked her abs at the local Y,
Singing "Anything Goes" and breaking into an Amish farm,
And gunning down the hypocrisy
of those Old Fashioned bearded perverts.
Serpents crawl between your legs, begging for hot chocolate,
Mrs. Reagan, raise our dead and
and milk the pruneskin 90 year old juice,
Cause constipation lurks in the homes of Middle America.
Verdant slumber, awaken in the night,
Bend your body like Gumby,
Twisting away to Rapper's Delight.
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